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How to Position Yourself for Mr. Right..........Sisters, How Long will you be Single?

This is a Counseling session!

Ref:  Proverbs 18:22 He who finds a wife finds a good thing and receives favour from the LORD.

1. The man you are praying for God to bring your way will not magically appear before you at the altar. You have to position yourself to be found.  If you are praying for a God fearing man and everyday you are in the club, you will hardly meet God fearing man at the club.

2. Remember, if being single is not pleasing to you, it is not pleasing to your God also. So you have to plan and order yourself aright for marriage.

3. God has asked men to find their own wives by themselves. So, you have to be found.  

4. You need to show your love for God and the things of God if you desire a godly man. 

6. One of the strongest fear of young men is getting married to a lady that will not submit to them after the marriage.

7. Another strong point is marrying a domineering wife, who will compete with the man rather than supporting  and helping him.

8. For godly men, their strongest fear is marrying a woman who will not have respect for the word of God and what it says about marriage.  Marriage is ordained by God and guided by Doctrines and ordinances.

9. A woman should be feminine, soft and tender.  But now, some sisters are looking so strong, energetic and physical.......factors that scare young men from ladies.

Thick thighs ❤:
What are you required to do - To be Found Early?

Being in the Right Place: - When you are ready for marriage, then accept that you are too old to be playing the hide and seek game.   What does this mean?

You are required to take positive steps that affirms what is in your heart. You have to be in a place that shows that you’re available and even interested in getting married.  You should be working with God to position you where your husband to be will find you.  I don't mean Facebook or Instagram, but in the house of God, serving!. 

The best place for your husband to find you is in the service of the Lord.  In the place of service, a lot of things turn around for you according to God's promises.  It is at the moment that you are serving God and his people you will be in right place at the right time to be found.  

Relationship - break away from married men and keep yourself for your husband and never go back to your vomit.  It might cost you some hardship and discomfort bear all in good faith, your value and respect will soon go up.

Free yourself from office romance, no matter who is involved and for how long the error has lasted, put an end to it; else it will eventually pull down the marriage.  Since mistakes are part of life’s experience, you must learn how to separate yourself and firmly close that chapter before marriage.  

Whether you have found the man or not, Let your colleagues know you are ready for marriage and guide your heart strictly and focus on your work avoiding distractions.

Separate yourself from men’s jokes. Keep away from all filthy conversation and men’s joke, whether in the office or at home.  Return to the old part of a good girl you parents used to call you.  It is those same old quality behaviors that your would-be husband is expecting to see in you.

Your Money: Think not that your money will get you a good husband, even your beauty cannot.  All these are good, but will never get you a good husband.  They could however get you a vegetable of a man, lazy and without any reasonable skill and competence; a man without a visible future.  

Repair damaged relationships:  You are a child of God. Take every step to repair damaged relationship in the work place, recover your integrity spoilt by any office relationship, disagreements or any other attitude that gave people wrong impression about you.  Make friends with all and sundry and let them know you are ready to settle down with a man and move on in life.

Drop your “Spinster jacket” and turn a new leaf of life. Live within your means and learn to plan your expenses in accordance with your income and be contented with the resources God has given you. May be you are used to receiving favours from men, you know that all such favour will dry up after marriage, so that you will be left with your income and that from your husband.

This awareness will make you prudent in spending money and more responsible in actions. So, you desires will adjust and come to size with your income and what you doing have you will not desire.

Join a bible believing church if you don’t belong to any and commit yourself in one or two groups in the church.  Discover your purpose in life.  What He created you to fulfill and commit yourself to serving Him and through His help fulfill your destiny.

Get firmly committed to the things of God, be friendly with all persons you meet in the house of God, giving respect to whom respect is due.  Show love and respect to all your colleagues, and people big or small.  Don’t choose who to respect and who not to respect.

Do not despise any body and keep an open mind and be approachable. Get wisdom and knowledge on how to relate well with people of all categories. If you hope to marry a Politician or a successful man, you must know how to relate with people of different classes.

Love the Lord and His Word: - Love and obey the Word of God and practice whatever you understand in the bible.  As you do this, you will begin to hate everything contrary to the word of God and that is a great revival entering your soul. As a result, you will also begin to have hatred for sin (open and secret sins). 

Begin to pray for your husband The Lord will direct the steps of your husband unto you from wherever he may be. Continue in prayer until he manifests.  When he does, please ask God if he is the one you have been praying for.  Do this even if he meets all the requirement you have listed in your diary.

Guard your heart. (Proverbs 4:23) - STOP watching sexually strong reality TV videos, going to clubs, love-sex songs, pornography etc. Don’t you know that those things you see and hear plant seeds in your heart?  When the evil seed germinates and is seeking expression, you will start wondering where the pressure is coming from.  It is from the inside of you, the result of wrong consumption or exposure. Destroy every toxic material in your possession.

Your Character will be tested: - Build your character, acquire several vocational skills that will help you contribute to the family in case the unforeseen happens  Your beauty may attract men to you, but it is your character, attitude and friendliness that will endear you to people.  When you walk straight and your stance is known on some major issues, then people will know you for the things you believe in. 

If you have a consistent lifestyle, even your colleagues could recommend you to their relatives for marriage and your journey to the isles becomes easy.  I have seen it severally, but you must be upright and good.  You must be an honestly good daughter of Zion for unbelievers to recommend you.

Love will Establish you: - Love for God and man will establish you.  You must therefore love and love and love.  Be ready to share good things with people and treat men as your brother and women as your sisters or even mothers if they are your senior.  Maintain a consistent love life, giving to people who need help when it is in your power to do so till it becomes your way of life.  

Carry your body in Honour: -  Decide early enough to carry your body in honour as the  bible advised you in Romans 12:1.  It is one of the signs that you are ready to drop your spinster jacket, the toga of a bad girl and move to the next level of your life - settle down with a man and raise worthy children.

Bikinis, and all “TV star” appearances, seductive dressing, singing and dancing worldly songs, wearing super sexy miniskirts and tight fitted trousers to show off your goodies are forbidden. Can I shock you, as you organize your appearance, your thoughts and imaginations; even your mind will begins to see a different picture of a beautiful mother of four or five children. Then you know your husband is nearby.  

Keep Godly friends - If you keep wrong friends, one day they will teach you what they are doing and you will join them.  If you keep a prostitute as a friend, one day she will teach you how to prostitute.  Keep only profitable friends, remove your name from the list of “sweet ladies” mistress of men with money, become a lady of substance with rich inner beauty and grace.

Put God first:  The truth is that if God is not the first person in your life, your life as a child of God will never be colourful.  Spend quality time daily on the word, applying what you leaned to your daily life and praying in faith. Pray for the kind of man you can love and cope with.  

You are not a car that any man can drive.  There is somebody somewhere that is created for you and that will willingly love and appreciate you as you are. Never seek to change your looks so you can look like someone else.  Your better half is somewhere and only God can tell you where he is, that's why you ought to pray to God .hat God will direct his steps to you. Don't think that anybody can marry you...NO, you are wrong. There is a man you cannot cope with even for 6 months because he is not meant for you and there is a man that will come to you, you will notice peace of mind and as the peace continues with the blessings of God that follows marriage from heaven, you will then realize that he is your true husband and a gift from God.

Spend quality time with God daily and meditate on things that will please God. Think of holiness, soul winning, righteousness etc.  The devil will come to tell you that your answer is delayed or will not come, shout him down!  

Continue to sing praises unto God daily, He will arise for your help and suddenly, the reproach a being single will be lifted off your neck in Jesus name.

Conclusion: - I want to challenge the sisters to try these steps and share their experiences with me. Up your game and let your marriage happen.  May they work for you in Jesus name?



 CHRISTIAN MARRIAGE .....And the challenges of meeting Rich Believing Men

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Most believers who are fervent in the Word, prayer and deeds are poor.

At the same time, we have sisters, the only thing they have going for them is outward beauty and worldly wisdom, eloquence of speech and all kinds of mannerism, without godly virtues and character, desiring to marry born again brothers. .it cannot work. 

Sisters should de-emphasize on their beauty and outward appearance and develop biblical virtuous and characters that make a christian lady the coast of all men - Love, forgiveness, care, hard-work, humility and submissive attitude. They say whatever a man can do, a woman can do also, but I counsel ladies, in whatever you are doing, don't let your feminine nature of care and compassion leave you.  If it goes away, you will become empty and confused in life.

There are rich believers who have pass through the "Red Sea and the Lion's den" experiences in life before emerging by divine mercy to become rich. After suffering in the "wilderness" they have become wiser about things of life, especially the opposite sex.  These brothers who have received divine favour and approval easily takes calculated steps in business and mission that result some pretty good bank account balances and they are very careful in relating with anybody.  Some of them are already married to their destiny helpers who have endured with their trial over years, others among them are still single.

The single ones among them can NEVER marry any woman without knowing the will of God for such marriage.  Your outward, catwalk and tattoo marks on your body are useless to them and actually disgusts them.  

This is why it seem marriage is hard for some sisters today.  You have some one not born again, not knowing the Word of the Lord or the Lord himself professing to be a christian and all her actions are worldly.  She is scheming for the best more or less. If a christian brother shows up, good! If an unbeliever come forward for marriage, she will manage him. 

There is also the issue of maturity required in marriage for both men and women and in most cases, when you meet a young girl matured for marriage, you will know.  I met one several years ago and this girl just finished from secondary school and preparing to enter the university, but she is full of marriage, talking about her interest to marry early in life and raise her children. What about school, yes...she is preparing to enter university and she hopes that while in school, she will get married. So, how will you combine both, school and marriage, where do you think you husband will be living and working, what if he is far from the university. She had several options to maintain her marriage and still obtain her good grades and graduate....all the plans and options made out by her long before meeting the right man.

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Yet, I have met some completely  unbelieving ladies in church who believe they can win any man over with her beauty and outward looks....my counsel have always been the truth, "you can win them to sleep with you, but will hardly succeed when it comes to marriage".  Some of those guy your looks will win are battling with spirit of lust, once they overcome the spirit of lust, then they will look into your character, intelligence and christian values.

A believer's life is in stages - you have the born again stage, the spiritual training stage, the test and practical experience stages, the choices stage, Maturity and growth stage. But God has a way of doing His things and everyone must not pass through the stages in the same order.  Some people has pass through though experiences in life before God rescued them and once they become born again, having decided to serve God alone zooms into the growth stage and God sustains them.

A sister that wants to marry a believer must know that if she is not transformed by the Word of God to the understanding of Patience, Love and Submission will hardly succeed. The idea of marriage as ordained by God is the fusion of a man and a woman together to become one in the spirit first and walk together physically on earth to fulfill their individual destinies.  It is not all about going on holiday, dining in the best Restaurants and driving the best of cars and having everything at your call, which is very good also, but that is not necessarily the concept of marriage.

If both of you are not together in the spirit, you cannot  walk together successfully in the physical.  Marrying a sister or brother who is not in tandem with you in the spirit will surely bring setback.  Marriage is good, but certain mistakes could derail your destiny fulfillment and spell doom for the marriage. 

Marriage is not just good, honourable, it is also an important part of your christian walk.  Marriage help you achieve many things in life.  It is in marriage that you have your own physical best friend - your husband or wife.  He or she is your own!

It is in marriage you have your own children and then family.  Marriage help you to focus in life and then move forward and once married, you don't desire or lust after any other man or woman, you have one!

Once, I asked God why there are many unmarried sisters in the church and what I interpret the answer I got to mean is that many of them are not born again.  God said, no lady who is born again and prays for marriage within some period of time will remain single.  Based on that answer, I used to challenge the sisters to be truely born again and then cry to God and see His mercy upon their lives, but how many women and ladies are ready to be truely born again and pray fervently?

If you are careful to observe some marriages with sisters who are worldly conscious, you will notice constant disagreement - No submission.  You will notice carefree attitude to prayer and no praises until they come to church - No love for God.  You will also notice that she continues to carry her worldly friends along.  The old friends she "cruised" life with in school when they were unbelievers are still closely attached to them and everything that happens in the house, she tell them.  Then also, as they continue to disagree in the house, the man's faith in God and marriage begins to shake, and before you know it divorce is on the table. A wrong marriage leads to backsliding from faith spiritual decline and ineffective service to God.

The first thing a lady waiting for Godly marriage should do is to give her heart to God in true repentance and make up her mind to follow Christ all the way through before and after marriage.  It is not to be born again for marriage, after marriage you return to your old life.  Decide to serve God and do His work with zeal and with the gifting He has bestowed on you. You should live in obedience and in absolute love for God and His work. These are not to be done for any ulterior motive, such as: serving to be noticed by men, advertising yourself for marriage, et cetera. It is important that you should know that you are dealing with God, Who knows even the reins of our heart and the motives behind the things that we do. God cannot be deceived. 

You may note also, that the service to God which you rendered to Him while single will be extended in marriage because you now have children whom you should train in the way of the Lord, in prayer, obedience, fasting, going out to win souls etc. And children learn faster when they see you do the same things you are asking them to do.  Serve God when you are single, so that you will have your own testimonies of God's wonders in your life before you enter marriage. You cannot carry into married life any responsibility you did not do when you were single. It  is not easy.

It is good that you get prepared for marriage. Your attitude to it matters a lot. It is plausible when sisters, Develop life long characters of love, forgiveness, hope, faith in God, His Word and His Son Jesus Christ.  Learn submission and be submissive,  How often to you obey your parents and other seniors?  How often do you obey the Word of God you have received and how often do you obey the voice of God?  

It is necessary to develop a right attitude for marriage. if we look at the example of Rebekah as recorded in Genesis 24, What Sister Rebekah did, is a challenge to single sisters. The servant of Abraham sent to get a wife for Isaac, his son, prayed that God should proper his journey by sending the right lady his way and that right lady would be discovered by a simple humility test.

That Rebekah was performing domestic chores in her parents’ home was evidenced when she came to draw water from the well. That was where Abraham’s servant saw her. It might be arranging and cleaning chairs in the Church or office. Are you too big to do this? Do you shout at the brothers if they request that you render the service? Do you know if they are using this to test your character? Unknown to Rebekah, she was fulfilling the prayer request of Abraham’s servant concerning help. He had asked God for the sister, who would render help beyond his request. And Rebekah did that, though she might have good excuses why she should not render the service. Imagine serving water to a stranger, who might not have washed his mouth for days, drinking from her cup! She might be rushing home to wash her clothes, tiredness for overworking herself, et cetera.

It is good to be zealous in doing good work. She hastened in all her encounters with the servant. She committed her family by offering accommodation to the stranger and his camels. Who would not like to marry such a lady? Dressing well is very important for you. It does not mean wearing costly fabrics. With it, Esther won the love of her husband, King Ahasuerus. Queen Vashti was kicked out by the same king for refusing to wear what he demanded from her.    

Purity is important for Christians. Rebekah lived a chaste life. And so did Mary, the mother of our Lord Jesus. God has not changed His stand on holiness. During engagement or after traditional and court wedding, 

Learn to discipline your self on many things in life. There is a time to say No to a wrong advice from friends, and a time to say no to a bad attitude. If you marry a believer without christian virtues inside of you, then you must build them up, else that marriage will surely have problems.  The world and worldly people tolerate nonsense, which many believers cannot tolerate.

Christian marriage is the best for you because it help you fulfill your destiny as a woman, but you have to know God, Love Him and serve His Son Jesus Christ, our hope from the time you committed your life unto Him until you leave this world.  Christian marriage gives you peace of mind and you know that whenever you die, you will meet the Lord in glory.  

Please read our several write ups on marriage as I sign off.

Remain blessed in the Lord



OFFICE AFFAIR:.....Adultery -That your Boss will Destroy Your Marriage

It starts with working together, closeness and then intimacy begins to develop. This is the time the woman should draw a line that she or the man must not cross - Why?  

She is a married woman and all her love, emotion and feeling should be shared with her husband and not with colleague or Boss.  

Don't let your Boss or Colleague destroy your home.  
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 Enticing and fake compliments are released at the woman ....

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  He is enticing you with fake Kiss and you are quite - Shame
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  You leave home early to office - for early morning romance - Shame on you
  Having Lunch Together - For what purpose?

 Now  - See where you have landed yourself and shame beckons!


Please fear God and run away from every temptation to cheat on your husband in the office. Why wreck your own home.  The secret will surely be leaked and shame, divorce and humiliation will follow.

Change your mindset, fear God and amend your ways today - The kingdom of heaven is at hand.


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