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I AM TIRED OF BEING SINGLE.........I want to Marry and have my own Children - Jesus help me!

                          Will she play the Boss...?

Is this young guy serious?

What a young lady or mature woman needs, when she wants to get married at any time is wisdom, right attitude and knowledge of what to do.   

What Jesus will do for you is to make you 'correct for any good man' to marry.  Jesus will equip you with the word of God, wisdom and excellent spirit that will turn you to a 'Gold Fish', that a man discovers...and he would give thanks to God.

Realize that in Christ, all things are yours.  Time is not necessarily a barrier, so delay is not denial. A believer that wants to get married to another believer, working class or a businessman should examine herself, attitude, beliefs, conducts, and be correct...Be that believing Sister that will make any man glow for joy.

There are sisters like that.  When you meet them, you wish you were not married.  The same goes for brothers.  I can tell from personal experience that there are brothers a Sister will meet and she would wish she were not yet  married.  Years ago, a Sister got close to me through work relationship and when she discovered I was single, confided in me that if she was still single...Nothing in this world would have stopped her from marrying me.

A HUMBLE, GENTLE, WORD AND SPIRIT-FILLED ATTITUDE IS YOUR critical selling point as a bachelor or spinster.  It is not your beauty or qualifications.  So many are handsome and pretty, well educated and skillful, but what is the state of their heart?.

This transformation by Jesus Christ that gives you the right knowledge, attitude and belief, will not only attract you to the right spouse sooner than later, but it will also sustain you in the marriage.  So make sure you get yourself to a good start, including some cooking skills...you you can once-in-a-while tantalize your husband with mouth watering meals. 

Then, you are ready to apply your faith and pray with the word of God continually until you met the right man.

You are not expected to have a boyfriend or such people, when you are ready for marriage.  You should control your emotions and reserve yourself for that man you are praying to God about.  Even when he shows up, you will not agree to go to bed with him, just then...NO! If he is a believer, he would not insist - for there is no born again brother that will want to defile the bed before marriage.

As you pray and meditate on the word of God, consider the following steps:

Preliminary considerations

1. Give your  heart to Jesus Christ, make Him the Saviour and Lord of your life.

2. Consider the reasons why God instituted marriage and the reasons for your desire to marry early.

3. Do Not enter marriage on impulse, without knowing the person very well.  In the days gone bye, it used to be so, but no young person does that today.  You need time to understand the person you plan to marry. Said bluntly, “it is better to not marry than to marry the wrong person. 

4. Do not rush into marriage  - 
Rushing into marriage as one of the biggest mistakes anyone can make. There may be reasons to get out of the house on time for women, especially when the girls are many and there is hardship in the house, but even at that, Don't ruch into marriage.  

A divorced woman has this advice to give  "I got married to get away from home," she said. "So there was this fellow I’d been going with, and we up and got married the week I turned 18. Well, two children and 11 years later, we divorced. It wasn’t a wise decision to marry him but it was an out for me at that time. 

5. Do not think you can get out of marriage easy if you make mistakes.  
It is not so, because emotions in involved and family members and children would have to be taken into consideration.  "Give it time before you jump in. If you can, try to know the man or woman in and out before committing yourself to that person.  

It would make a lot of difference in the days after the marriage.  A situation where you discover a sensitive information about your partner after marriage is always painful to bear and soon, you will start feeling betrayed.

6. An old lady says :
"The biggest mistake is being too quick to enter a marriage," she said. "Get to know that person very, very well in all circumstances, the happiness part and the stressful parts. So both people have to be very willing and very open, and often times make concessions, as they get to know each other. So please, take a very serious look. You cannot mold your spouse into something that you want.''

7. Do your life goals align?
The woman should make sure — before committing — that their partner’s goals for a good life together align with theirs. Unfortunately, such discussions are sometimes not explicit and detailed. 

You do not have to assume they agree, take steps to agree on major areas that could lead to early disagreement.  You want to have two children only, how many does he want to have.  "But sometimes people actually have pretty strong feelings about whether they will or won’t have children. And one person can say, 'I really want children.' The other one says, 'Well, I’m not sure' and they let it go. Issues of children, money and close relations are contentious issues that should be settled 

A woman, no matter how desperate she may be to get married, must establish she is in love with the man ...for real.  Also, make sure the man is in love with you.  Never assume that the way he spends money on you, buying you goods gifts etc is sign of his love.  

When it comes to marriage, you should have convincing evidence that the man is in love with you before you start talking about marriage.  When a man is serious with you, to the point of proposing marriage, the woman should reciprocate by telling the man the truth about herself, family background etc. Let there be nothing you hide from a man like that.

Then, watch his countenance after you have told him your story and background.  If he is in love with you, events after this time will reveal it and then you can jointly plan your life and move forward together.

What men wants in a woman:

1. Every man is looking for a woman that will complete him.  I means a woman that will compliment him in a lot of wars.

2.  Men are looking also for destiny helpers, especially those in the low and middle glass categories.

3. Men are not looking for a spoilt-child or someone that will compete with him at home.  In life, you are at liberty to choose the kind of life that completes you. And when it comes to settling down, the same case applies. 

4. Humble and submissive woman - 
A woman who is opinionated and is able to make decisions on her own is attractive, but she must still be submissive unto the husband. She should be teachable and willing to cooperate with the husband when important decisions are to be taken.

5. She is real and straight forward.  
A woman that is open minded and not one that hides her information from the husband.  A hard working woman, compassionate and caring is always better than the women that argue and quarrel on every little issue.

6. A home builder
A home builder is a wise woman of God who fears the Lord and her family and she is ready to support her husband and take care of her children. She is patient with her husband family members and give peace to the family.   A young man married his wife while the younger brother was still living with him.  The new wife was patient till they moved into a bigger house.

What does the Bible say about Marriage?
Genesis 1:28 - And God blessed them. And God said to them, “Be fruitful and multiply and fill the earth and subdue it and have dominion over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the heavens and over every living thing that moves on the earth.”

Matthew 19:5 - And said, ‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’?

Ephesians 5:25 - Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her,

Ephesians 5:22 - Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord.

Hebrews 13:4 - Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled, for God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterous.

1 Corinthians 7:39 - A wife is bound to her husband as long as he lives. But if her husband dies, she is free to be married to whom she wishes, only in the Lord.

Titus 2:5 - To be self-controlled, pure, working at home, kind, and submissive to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be reviled.

1 Timothy 5:8 - But if anyone does not provide for his relatives, and especially for members of his household, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.

Matthew 19:6 - So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.”

Colossians 3:18-21 - Wives, submit to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord. Husbands, love your wives, and do not be harsh with them. Children, obey your parents in everything, for this pleases the Lord. Fathers, do not provoke your children, lest they become discouraged.

Ephesians 5:23-33 - For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands. Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. 

Genesis 1:28 - And God blessed them. And God said to them, “Be fruitful and multiply and fill the earth and subdue it and have dominion over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the heavens and over every living thing that moves on the earth.”

1 Corinthians 6:20 - For you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body.

Ephesians 5:1-33 - Therefore be imitators of God, as beloved children. And walk in love, as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us, a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God. But sexual immorality and all impurity or covetousness must not even be named among you, as is proper among saints. Let there be no filthiness nor foolish talk nor crude joking, which are out of place, but instead let there be thanksgiving. For you may be sure of this, that everyone who is sexually immoral or impure, or who is covetous (that is, an idolater), has no inheritance in the kingdom of Christ and God. ...

Ruth 3:10-11 - And he said, “May you be blessed by the Lord, my daughter. You have made this last kindness greater than the first in that you have not gone after young men, whether poor or rich. And now, my daughter, do not fear. I will do for you all that you ask, for all my fellow townsmen know that you are a worthy woman.

1 Corinthians 13:4-7 - Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.

James 1:1-27 - James, a servant of God and of the Lord Jesus Christ, To the twelve tribes in the Dispersion: Greetings. Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing. If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given him. 

Genesis 2:24 - Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.

Genesis 2:18 - Then the Lord God said, “It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him.”

Proverbs 5:15-21 - Drink water from your own cistern, flowing water from your own well. Should your springs be scattered abroad, streams of water in the streets? Let them be for yourself alone, and not for strangers with you. Let your fountain be blessed, and rejoice in the wife of your youth, a lovely deer, a graceful doe. Let her breasts fill you at all times with delight; be intoxicated always in her love. ...

1 Peter 3:1-7 - Likewise, wives, be subject to your own husbands, so that even if some do not obey the word, they may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives, when they see your respectful and pure conduct. Do not let your adorning be external—the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing you wear— but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God's sight is very precious. For this is how the holy women who hoped in God used to adorn themselves, by submitting to their own husbands, ...

1 Corinthians 7:1-9 - Now concerning the matters about which you wrote: “It is good for a man not to have sexual relations with a woman.” But because of the temptation to sexual immorality, each man should have his own wife and each woman her own husband. The husband should give to his wife her conjugal rights, and likewise the wife to her husband. For the wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does. Likewise the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does. Do not deprive one another, except perhaps by agreement for a limited time, that you may devote yourselves to prayer; but then come together again, so that Satan may not tempt you because of your lack of self-control. ...

Ephesians 5:23 - For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior.

Amos 3:3 - “Do two walk together, unless they have agreed to meet?

1 John 3:16 - By this we know love, that he laid down his life for us, and we ought to lay down our lives for the brothers.

1 Peter 3:1 - Likewise, wives, be subject to your own husbands, so that even if some do not obey the word, they may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives,

1 Corinthians 6:1 - When one of you has a grievance against another, does he dare go to law before the unrighteous instead of the saints?

Esther 5:3 - And the king said to her, “What is it, Queen Esther? What is your request? It shall be given you, even to the half of my kingdom.”

Revelation 21:1-2 - Then I saw a new heaven and a new earth, for the first heaven and the first earth had passed away, and the sea was no more. And I saw the holy city, new Jerusalem, coming down out of heaven from God, prepared as a bride adorned for her husband.

Ephesians 5:22-32 - Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands. Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word.

It is not easy to find love and at the time you desire one.  In the case of women, a man that will be available and one that enjoys quality time alone with her is important . Is he She enjoys her time alone  Spending time together as a couple is crucial in a relationship, but spending time apart is equally paramount. Time alone allows for personal growth which again leads to a healthy relationship. A woman who knows that time alone is important is easy to love and reason out with.

A man want a woman that truely love him for who he is and not one that will soon start comparing him with other men,  A woman who is truthful, honest and hardworking will always appreciated. A woman who is with a man just because she loves him and enjoys his company, doesn’t matter what he has. These are the women men are looking for.


Get Busy Working for God
I was and still am very busy working for God. I found that when I was busy working, I didn't have time to feel sorry for myself because I had no one. If you are a Christian, you want your mate to see you busy working for the Kingdom. 

Let Him Find and Pursue You
He that findeth a wife, findeth a good thing and obtains favor from the Lord (Proverbs 18:22). If you want your husband to have favor, let him find you. Let him pursue you. It’s okay to show an interest, but these days, the art of pursuit is lost. Women these days will ask a man for his digits, ask him out and pay the way. No! No! Ladies…God created man to be a hunter. Hunting and pursuit is innate in his makeup. If you are doing all the hunting, you've taken away what God created him to do. 

Furthermore, if you are constantly pursuing, how do you know for sure that he’s just not in it for the ride? Let him pursue! Let him be what God created him to be. I've heard women say “well he’s taking too long”. Please understand and listen when I say that God wants the man to take the lead in relationships. He wants the man to pace the relationship. When women take leadership roles, we can expect disorder in our relationships because we are out of God’s order.

Work on Yourself
What are you doing to make yourself valuable in a relationship? What are you bringing to the table? Strive to improve yourself in education, career, finances and in your walk with God. If you want a Godly man, then you must become a Godly woman. If you want someone debt free, then you should become debt free. You attract what you are. Can you cook? The old adage, "the quickest way to a man's heart is through his stomach" is true. Just as man was created to hunt and lead, women were created to nurture. Feeding your family is a part of nurturing. Learn to cook the basics and then expand your skills. Take this time to prepare so when he is presented, he will see your worth.

Don't Waste Time on Relationships That Aren't Going Anywhere
If you know this person is not husband material, let him go!   God will not send you someone if your hands are already full. Why should he? Empty your hands, release those moribund relations,  so you can fully receive what God has. Don't waste your time.

Pray for your husband. Whoever and wherever he is, start praying for him now. Pray that God will make him what he needs to be for you and to make you what he needs as a help mate. Pray for his career, his decisions, his finances, his relationship with God.

Beloved, Jesus is coming back soon.  "Where will you spend eternity - In heaven or hell? This is the time to work-out your salvation.  Now is the acceptable time!

Repent and give your heart to Jesus. He will give you a new life, victory and eternal life.  Will you accept Him today?


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