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HOW TO FIND LOVE.........EASILY, Starting from yourself and Spreading the Happiness!

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The relationship we focus on here is marital and as you may know, requirement for christian marriage, which is based on God and his word is very high.  If we will be honest in our analysis, we will admit that christian marriage is not for 'small boy and girls' because it carries with it heavy responsibility before God and man.

It is not the same thing as your courtship or love affairs that people organize for themselves.  Christian marriage requires among other things knowledge of the word of God and those relating to the ordinance of marriage.  It requires maturity to the extent that the man and woman should be willing to 'leave their respective homes' and form an entirely new family.

It requires willingness to adjust to family life and all its constraints.  I means that both couple would have to cut some of their friends off, learn how to relate to each other as well as the in-laws on both sides.  They should be courageous to loose to a large extent some family ties and downgrade them to allow the new family to be firmly established.

Many times, the first major trouble the new couples face is usually from their parents and in-laws.  Some parents would say their daughter with you is their favorite and as such she should spend a night or two with them every month or forth-night.  The initial problem could also be from siblings etc.

These are the reasons why it seems as though love is elusive.  There may be a million men around you, but when you are ready for marriage, you will soon realize there are no man to marry.  Many of those men smiling at you and complimenting your appearance in the mornings are not ready for marriage, some of them are already married with children and others are divorcees.

READY FOR MARRIAGE - Make sure you are healthy.

However, if you are emotionally, financially and materially ready for marriage, then put away guile from you.  Put away lies, hypocrisy and deceit. If you are born again, then be born again indeed.  If you are not yet born again, then get born again, give your heart and life to Jesus Christ , make Him the Lord of your life.

Why is this counsel necessary, it is by His grace that you can get a good husband or good wife.  You with worldly wisdom and the leading of flesh, the devil will deceive you and you may end up with an unbelieving man or woman as spouse...which is a shaky foundation for a christian home.

When you are ready, make sure you are well and your body system is functioning.  Do a self examination test for yourself to ascertain you have the ability to keep your wife or husband satisfied in the marriage. If you are a lady, make sure you can conceive as a woman and carry the pregnancy for nine months and deliver the baby.  If there are imbalances, take steps to correct them medically and prayerfully.

These are sensitive information that people assume are in order before they marry.  But we have seen that nowadays, young people deceive others, by telling lies about their health status, which endangers their marriage and many collapse immediately the other party discovers he/she had been deceived. 

Many marriages has broken down because the woman cannot conceive at all by medical advice, some have had their womb removed on medical advice and they concealed the information from their intending partner.  Some guys cannot produce sperm and thus father their children and these important health information are hidden from their future partner till after the marriage.

All the points I have mentioned here are surmountable medically and prayerfully.  So, if you have tried to resolve them without success, then let your finance know and together both of you can seek solution before or after the marriage, but you must inform the person.


When it comes to finding love, for marriage, you must let the Holy Spirit guide and lead you.  This is because appearance is deceitful.  Ladies has become make-up specialists and a lady of 30 years could easily dress and make-up to look 15 or 17 years old with a shinning and glowing skin.

Reach OutMeet people, join groups in the church and participate in all the activities you can and as always...BE YOURSELF.  Never try to be someone else. make christian friends and people you can learn something good from.  Have your personal rules and code of conduct and no matter who is coming around, do not not over-step your rules.

When you’re making friends, avoid being judgmental. 

Every one is not for you or put in a better way, you cannot live with everybody and do not be in a haste to bond with every interesting person you find.  There are many people you cannot survive 6 months with, while your own person is your own person, so allow the leading of the Spirit of God to help you.

Be generous with your time, be ready to assist people. Be a team player in the office where you work. Friendship and making friends requires a bit of commitment. If you’re serious about finding love, get serious about spending time with people. Accept invitations to parties, sporting events, and concerts. The point is to create a lot of situations that give you the chance to get to know people - and it’s hard to do that from home.

Be Available -  For the right meetings and programmes in the church and with close friends.  If you are genuinely born again, your husband is somewhere looking for you.  You cannot be born again, spirit filled and prayerful and yet be desperate for a man to marry.  All you just do is to ask the person God has assigned to you to locate you...and boom, you will meet him when you least expect.

Consider your appearance. When you’re looking for love, dress your best always and when it matters most. Let your appearance be with dignity and handle your body with honour like someone reserving herself for the best.  

Be cheerful and radiant with bright colour dresses, unique with clean, well-styled clothes and a pleasant expression on your face. The addition of a little perfume or cologne also helps to send out the right kind of signal.

Be a good listener. If you find someone interesting, ask more questions, show people you care about them.  Be honest and sincere. In other words, be yourself. 

Stay on the same wavelength. Try to be in tune with what the other person wants.  Don’t be too pushy. Remember that everyone is dealing with insecurities and personal issues, so try not to take things too personally at this early stage.

Be open and take some calculated risks.  Don't be too rigid as to accept invitations and dates.  For dates and outings, you may go with your close friend or relation where necessary.  Do not make yourself vulnerable. Don't tempt the devil, it’s not time to take a risk and lay yourself open to the person. 

Observe him/her a little longer and tell him or her what you’re feeling. It may make you a little uncomfortable, but the only way to know whether this relationship is turning into love is to find out if the feeling is mutual.  

If the person is interested in continuing the relationship with you, you may be on your way to finding love. Love is built on affection, trust, attraction, mutual regard - and it all starts with people agreeing that they both want to pursue it. 

Friends, give God praise for keeping you alive today.  Many promising guys,  great men have gone without achieving their goals or knowing the Lord. You have a chance to write your name in the book of life, by surrendering your heart to Jesus NOW!


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